how selfish of me.

Even now I still get jealous when I look through pictures that I'm not in.

Ha, not because I was exclued; that was my own fault, and I know that now. 

________


I wanted so badly to not be seen as a child by you.



I held your secrets so tightly! And with so much pride; as if they actually were my own to bear!


___________________


I wanted so badly for you to be ok that killed me when ever you weren't.

You knew that.

At least, that's what I've come to realize.