It's raining.

 





I don’t yet have the words to truly express what I feel;
anger, rage, sorrow, or even when I’m euphoric. I stand
here just floundering around with words pouring from my mouth.
or just in empty silence. Coughing up my heart and flattening my lungs. out.







I'm glad you watched me grow. I'm glad I knew you.
I glad i could speak to you. I'm glad i was the one you could
come to for a short time. I'm so thankful for that time.






I love this person, my friend. Your words written over multiple pages
your heart threaded in ever letter and sentence.
I saw you in the words you wrote.



Forgive me if you mistake what i say for anger. I'm simply trying to
defend; fight off the world from those who i think need it. Forgive me if you saw it as something irrational.
I'm sorry if you didn't care for my words.
I'm sorry that I bothered you.




You never answered my questions.
you never answered my question.






CHRIST! I gave so much. CHRIST! ALL I WANTED WAS FOR YOU TO BE OK!
and i wanted you to be there when I called.
I didn't wanted to become just one of the crowd to you.




I'm greatful I had that time. That I had all of what I wanted.
I miss you. But the memories are enough.






I'm so sorry, I'm sorry that your life was sad,
That you turned to the bottle, that you turned to filling your lungs with smoke.
that you felt enough to hurt yourself.




I'm so sorry. That your mother and brother didn't defend you.
I hope you know that i always will.









It's raining.